Did you know that every pregnancy is a first?
Yes, your pregnancies. Each one is a first.
This is an idea I had never contemplated before, but learned now that I have done this 3 times, 3 different amazing ways!
You can:
-Do whatever you want
-Make as many plans
-Carry out the ultimate “what I eat in a day”
-Take all things vitamins and prenatals
-Read all the mom life books
-Dive in to all the pregnancy and childbirth blogs
And still, nothing will ever prepare you for your unique pregnancy and labor experience. It is unique with each and every one you will ever have because pregnancy is one of the most unpredictable experiences you can ever have!
I have had 3 pregnancies and each one was experienced as if I were about to have my very first child. And while the physical aspect of it all is the top factor in the pregnancy experience, this was true for me also in regards to my emotional and mental state.
Following are the experiences I had having my 3rd baby. I will elaborate on the things that happened with her vs my first 2 and some on the experiences I had with the first 2 that didn’t occur this time around.
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3rd Pregnancy, Labor and Delivery: What Happened For The First Time And What Didn’t Happen This Time That Did With My First 2!
The Beginning
-Let me tell you that the first surprise was the baby herself. I thought I was done after having a boy and a girl, and this little one was totally unexpected!
-Unlike my first 2, my morning sickness lasted my whole pregnancy!
-This pregnancy was a massive motivation booster to take care of myself like I literally never had before. I took fitness, skin care, diet, you name it! I went crazy the first couple trimesters. This was the total opposite of my approach to my previous pregnancies.
-The thrill of wondering the baby’s gender! After having 1 boy and 1 girl, we couldn’t wait to find out what this one would be. In fact, this pregnancy I took as many “just for fun” gender predictions I could!
-Emotions. I don’t remember my emotions being too impacted by my first 2 pregnancies but this time I seemed really irritable often.
Second and Third Trimesters
-Breakouts! I broke out like crazy, but with some special care, I was able to keep it completely under control with Tea Tree facial wash, Tea Tree face wipes and Rose Petal Witch Hazel!
-I got SO HEAVY from my previous babies, that I made sure not to gain a crazy amount of weight this time, and I didn’t! I had already lost the weight prior to getting pregnant for the 3rd time so I was determined.
-ANEMIA! Omg this was the longest, worst physical hardship I’ve ever endured! It’s hard enough being pregnant as it is, so getting anemia WHILE pregnant, while having to take care of 2 under 2 was the death of me during the 2nd and 3rd trimesters of my last pregnancy.
-My cravings were pretty intense with my first 2, and not all al with this one.
Labor and Delivery
-From the very first signs of real labor contractions to the time they came out, my first 2 took over 10 hrs. My 3rd took 7 hrs.
-I had an epidural twice. The third time, baby came out too fast!
-My 3rd pushed herself out real quick whereas the 1st required an episiotomy and the 2nd was so big, he took me forever to push out!
-The support system I had with me during my first 2 labors were my husband, my Dad and my brother. This time though, no one made it but my godmother. (Thank God I wasn’t alone!)
Postpartum And Coming Home
-For my 3rd labor, let me just say that the nurses were impressed that, upon being transferred to recovery, I got off the wheelchair, walked to my bed and climbed on with no help, lol.
-Nursing my first babies was a piece o’ cake. Nothing prepared me for what happened with my 3rd. I cried so much and didn’t know what to do. It had never occurred to me that this could happen and I had given up. Luckily, I was broke long enough for things to eventually work out so I never got to by the organic formula I had relentlessly been researching about!
-My period came back within just a few months with my first 2. As I write this, I STILL haven’t started my period since having baby #3 which was 10 months ago!
-The postpartum pain after I got home. Omg that pain! I literally have no words. PP pain this time was even more excruciating than the few hours of labor I endured. Those were the longest 3 months of my life! Nursing was an agony. My contracting uterus hurt terribly at all freaking hours. And I couldn’t do much at all around the house.
-All things postpartum pain were taking a toll on me not only physically but also emotionally and all I did for days was cry; cry at the pain, the helplessness of watching my second child hurt because I couldn’t play with him, and of not being able to help my husband who was literally doing it all with so much dedication! These days here was the most painful stage I’d ever experienced in my life!
Final Thoughts
Third labor postpartum was bad enough for me to decide no more. No more babies. That’s what I said then, but of course now that I look back I’m always like “3 months is really not that bad”.
The impact of it all though, were the things, I never knew about; the things I was never prepared for, had never heard about and especially hadn’t even experienced it even after having 2 kids!
-I didn’t know about anemia
-I didn’t know my labor could happen fast enough for my husband not to make it from work
-I didn’t know it could take THIS LONG and still not have my period back
-I didn’t know going without an epidural would make no difference to me
-I certainly SWORE I’d never be “that Mom” who’d give up nursing her baby
-I was completely clueless what was about to ensue upon bringing the baby home
You see? I was just as clueless as I was at that one stage in my life when I had my first child. Embarrassing things happened upon having my second baby and all things hurt, pain and fatigue happened with my 3rd.
No matter how many kids we have, I think we can all say that we will never be able to say that we have been through all the things; no matter how much it feels that way!
Remember, each pregnancy is a first! And nothing, absolutely nothing can prepare you for it.
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